the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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