I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
