This dress was meant to end up on your floor
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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