your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Girls should come with a carfax report
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Randomize
