Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
