you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
