If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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