I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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