whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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