Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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