You work out of a Hotel?
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
