i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
