youre lurking in front of me
I bet he comes in French.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
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