i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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