i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
