did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Randomize