I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
