I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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