What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Randomize
