1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
