you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
