my vag is so smooth its legendary
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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