Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
