She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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