So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
