haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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