wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
