i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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