she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
