either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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