i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
