I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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