I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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