The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
