how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I smell like Dick and happiness
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