Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
