Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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