thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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