I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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