pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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