i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize