3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
