okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
