that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
