You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
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