Three words: puerto rican gang bang
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
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