So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Randomize
