I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
