Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Randomize
