I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
You can't just leave with hair like that
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Randomize
